Scream Match between Bro and Mum

LingRingSing — Mon, 06 Mar 2017 22:12:59 +0800

Not sure if this is the right section but the purpose of this thread is for me to voice out something that has been bothering me. Selfish as it sound but I need a bigger avenue to voice out. Frankly I am depressed and stressed out by my family's relationship.

Whenever my bro and mum start their conversation, it will usually end up in a screaming match. Doors will be slammed closed by my brother. My Mum will end up really upset and at times cry. They had a long history of argument and disagreements.

I feel really heartwrenching for my mum who is a retired lower middle class worker helping my brother financially even until today. My brother is not really educated as he dropped out from high school around PMR time. Over the years he has been working in quite random jobs. When my dad passed away, my brother inherit his Teksi and my bro has been driving it ever since. As the introduction of Grab and Uber, his income has been affected. On top of that, he has a wife and newborn. My sis in law told me that he rarely comes home even to see his newborn (once a month). That's because he has been sleeping in the Teksi trying to earn extra money.

Both my mum and brother are almost the same type, their neck are thick and do not want to back down from each other. Both of them think they are right and the opposite is wrong. Over the years, I feel I have developed some kind of self defence mechanism for these argument and ultimately my own problematic behavior. Reluctant to take sides in any of their argument, I become more silent than I used to be. I have become very distant but independent person. I have become socially awkward and I rarely show my real self and emotion (I can't laugh/smile when I am with my family). I would prefer to hide in the room.

I sense that every time my mum tried to give advise to my brother, he will not listen or respond negatively. Then it snowball from there. Sometimes my brother asked my mum something, and my mum replied somewhat negatively as she is more senior than him. Voice is raised from butterfly flapping its wings to over 130 decibels. What I sensed is that they both have their parts that are wrong. I have spoke to them multiple times, but of course they would not listen. I am worried one day something might happen if you know what I mean.

Please enlighten me with your advise.

Lowyat.NET: Latest topics by LingRingSing

Scream Match between Bro and Mum