How To Farm Your Workplace

One 0 One — Fri, 10 Oct 2014 22:34:37 +0800

Hi everyone, long time lurker here, and decided to finally post. Here are some tips that can help you all hopefully in the game called Real Life. If you feel the tips not suitable, please just ignore it. This are just general tips, maybe your situation is unique/special so it is not applicable.

Step 1 - Selling yourself.

I often see many candidates fail to sell themselves properly despite the numerous interview tips available everywhere. The point in interview is to present yourself to be as impressive as possible. Imagine yourself as an obscure product that cannot be measured easily. Now imagine yourself as a salesman trying to convince the interviewee to "buy" you.

Here is how a non-technical interview usually goes:

Tell me about yourself/what you do : Please dont give your grandmother story here. Start with your 1st job in your resume and very quickly progress to your most impressive part and spent time there to talk about it. The key part here is to talk more about your POWER and less about your weakness. You should interpret this question as "Time to talk about my accomplishments"

Tell me about your strengths : This question can be quite tricky, ass it can lead you to seem boastful. Different jobs require different answers, so tailor your answers according to the field you are in. Eg, Creative field will value creativity - taking out your super portfolio in your cool Ipad now would be a good idea. However regulation heavy line (banking?) might value obedience, conformity, and willingness to bow to boss more.

Just avoid generic answers like hardworking/honest etc. Those answers are for people who have no strengths. Personally I focus more on initiative more then anything, but that is up to you.

Tell me about your weakness : So many websites already taught this: again try to avoid overly common and generic answers like "too honest - wtf is too honest?" Give examples that show weakness that is easily redeemable and also demonstrates some measure of strengths. Eg, too focused on work to the extend that you are unable to see the big picture (only for junior lvl) etc.

Step 2 - Integration into workplace - human relationship.

1. Some basic advice here is to be as friendly, open, and approachable when you are in public, but revert to serious/intelligent mode during individual/small group discussions with colleagues. Sometimes, smart/serious people who dont talk much are often viewed as "stuckup", while people who are too friendly can become "clowns". Be adaptable and show that you have 2 sides by tailoring your approach to fit the situation! TLDR - Alot people - friendly. Less people - serious.

2. People often post in LYN forums that if they are too capable their boss will hate them. My advice is to watch more chinese ancient period dramas, especially those with evil concubines harems and learn how they play the game. (seriously, those dramas from china really teach you alot). If you have managed to help your boss solve a problem boss cannot solve, please DONT take credit in public, DONT boost in from of colleagues that you are better. Instead thank the manager for their "guidance", "patience", "teachings" and "leadership". That way people will know that you are the one who done the work, but you also compliment your manager on their leadership/mentorship skills. Win - Win situation for all. You get to be seen as capable and diplomatic, your boss is seen as super leader, promotions follow for your boss, and you get to follow him.

There is really no point in trying to 1-up your manager, especially when you are at low level. Your manager will get "jelly" and try to limit your opportunities, everyday marah you, ask you OT for nothing. I am not asking you to "s**k c**k" and wash his car, just align yourself with your boss. You good I good policy works the best. Its just a job, please dont make it personal.

In ancient china, if the emperor jealous of you he chop your head, if he feels you are useless he chop your head lagi. So you have to be capable, yet give him the credit and make sure he feels good "leading". Same theory here.

3. An extension of the post above. Dont badmouth people behind their back, not when you are in your company, not when you interview for your next job, not ever. I tend to be wary of people like that, personally I feel they are very backstabbish people.

Why would you complain about your boss to colleagues or big boss? Everyone got eyes and their own opinions, its not like you are going to change their viewpoint. Why would you complain about ex-boss during interview? The interviewer doesnt know your ex boss and will only feel that you are whiny and b****y. I understand that sometimes its very frustrating and you need an outlet, do it out of work, preferably with people who have no contact with your industry at all. Your mum, your gf, or better yet, your cat.

4. Complaining about boss on LYN is Number One Sin. You gain nothing, and you stand to lose everything if boss see it and tiok9 you.

Step 3 - Work smart. Or better yet, work smart and hard. (or just work smart if you are too lazy)

How do you refer to your co-workers? Yes, you call them co-workers, you call them boss, or underlings or slaves. To you, its an never-ending stream of faceless co-workers, bosses etc. Guess what, your boss also thinks you are a replaceable faceless worker!! If boss dont like you, he just replace you, no difference to him. If you everyday show boss black face, he just replace you with a nicer face, no loss to him.

To stand out, you need to differentiate yourself from the faceless crowd. Your value is determined by how unique and rare you are, not by what you do. A RM20 watch tells the time. A RM 20,000 gold/platinum/space rock watch tells the time also. The amount of work you do at is irrelevant, its the type of work that makes you valuable.

There are many ways to differentiate yourself, take more courses, proactively learn more about the business, be the guy who can "settle" saman. Just dont be the guy who diligently works in that unknown corner quietly doing simple repetitive data-entry. People often get stuck on long unreasonable OT hours doing all the work because they have no unique skill. They do alot of work, but are still unappreciated, often victimized, all because they are just a faceless piece of furniture to the boss.

Stand out from the crowd, acquire a unique skill. Then you can be the one calling the shots in your workplace.

Step 4 - Turn lemons into lemonade, then sell them, then invest in lemon stocks.

Every situation is an opportunity, you just have to learn how to see it (yes, I am zen-master Confucius in disguise).

Your boss gives you alot of work? An opportunity to learn!
Your boss torture you with alot of OT and no AL? Character training so you will find your next job easy!
Your boss ignores you? Chance to be independent and do things your way!
Your boss steals your GF? Time to get a new one!

Just dont stand there complaining about the situation (you can complain to your cat) and do nothing. Every scenario gives you unique opportunities to learn and develop technical or soft skills that can be used in later life.

Thats all for now! Moar tips to follow in the future!

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How To Farm Your Workplace