need money? read this..

Mr.Munky — Sat, 30 Sep 2006 20:42:41 +0800

Two high school sweethearts who went out together for four years in high school were both virgins; they enjoyed losing their virginity with each other in 10th grade. When they graduated, they wanted to both go to the same college but the girl was accepted to a college on the east coast, and the guy went to the west coast. They agreed to be faithful to each other and spend anytime they could together.
As time went on, the guy would call the girl and she would never be home, and when he wrote, she would take weeks to return the letters. Even when he emailed her, she took days to return his messages.

Finally, she confessed to him she wanted to date around. He didn't take this very well and increased his calls, letters, and emails trying to win back her love. Because she became annoyed, and now had a new boyfriend, she wanted to get him off her back.

So, what she did is this: she took a Polaroid picture of her having sex with her new boyfriend's and sent it to her old boyfriend with a note reading, "I found a new boyfriend, leave me alone." Well, needless to say, this guy was heartbroken but, even more so, was pissed. So, what he did next was awesome.

He wrote on the back of the photo the following, "Dear Mom and Dad, having a great time at college, please send more money!" and mailed the picture to her parents.

Pure Malaysian

Mr.Munky — Sat, 30 Sep 2006 20:40:57 +0800

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want
in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for
you.
Malaysians: No Stock.

RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments
ago?
Malaysians: Hallo, who page?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY.
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kews

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians: No-need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter
through this door?
Malaysians: (while pointing at door) Can or not?

WHEN ENTERTAINING
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Doe-waaaan!

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're
coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the
issue.
Malaysians: You mad, ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please ! lower your voice, I'm trying
to concentrate over here.
Malaysians: Shaddap lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU.
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time. Do I
know you?
Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment.
Malaysians: Die-lah!!

WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?
Malaysians: Why like that???? (jumping to conclusion)

Britons: thank you kindly for clarifying the particular matter that i needed to know.."
Malaysians: "like that izzit.."

Yo Mama....

Mr.Munky — Sat, 30 Sep 2006 20:39:59 +0800

Yo mama's so dumb she sat on TV & watched the couch!
Yo mama's so dumb she took a spoon to the Super Bowl!
Yo mama's so dumb that under "Education" on her job apllication, she put "Hooked on Phonics."!
Yo mama's so poor, she was kicking a can down the street. I askes what she was doing, and she said "Moving."!
Yo mama's teeth so yellow when she yawns traffic slows down!
Yo mama's so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention!
Yo mama's so poor your tv got 2 channels: on and off!
Yo mama's so old that when she was in school there was no history class!
Yo mama's so ugly when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the table and start screaming!
Yo mama's so ugly they pay her to put her clothes back on in strip joints!
Yo mama's so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning!
Yo mama's so ugly she has to trick or treat over the phone!
Yo mama's so ugly people go as her for Halloween!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is where You pay Yo telephone bill!
Yo mama's so stupid, that she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W's!
Yo mama's so stupid I said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon!
Yo mama's so stupid that she sold her car for gas money!
Yo mama's so stupid that she go hit by a parked car!
Yo mama's so stupid she thought meow mix was a record for cats!
Yo mama's so stupid she thought hamburger helper came with another person!
Yo mama's so stupid she studied for blood test & failed!
Yo mama's so stupid she asked me "what's that letter after x" and i said Y she said "cause I wana know"!
Yo mama's so stupid she jumped out the window and went up!
Yo mama's so stupid it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Mins!
Yo mama's so dumb, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept!
Yo mama's so dumb, she thinks socialism is partying!
Yo mama's so dumb, she got hit by a cup and told the police that she got mugged!
Yo mama's so fat, when she travels, she's gotta make two trips!
Yo mama's so fat when she went to an all You can eat buffet, they had to install speed bumps!
Yo mama's so fat when she went to the beach and Greenpeace tried to drag her into the water!
Yo mama's so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again!
Yo mama's so fat, she went bungee jumping and broke the bridge!
Yo mama's so fat when she backs up she beeps!
Yo mama's so fat when she went to the beach, everyone started screaming "Free Willy, Free WIlly"!!
Yo mama's so fat they had to baptize her at Sea World!
Yo mama's so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"!
Yo mama's so ugly the animals at the zoo feed her!
Yo mama's so fat, I tried to drive around her and ran out of gas!
Yo mama's so fat she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H D!
Yo mama's so fat she has to buy two airline tickets!
Yo mama's so fat she got hit by a truck and asked "Who threw that rock?"!
Yo mama's so fat she gets clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
Yo mama's so fat she fell in love... broke it!
Yo mama's so fat if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word for it!
Yo mama's so fat her yearbook picture is an arial!
Yo mama's so fat at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts!
Yo mama's so big that they had to change "One size fit's all" to "One size fits most"!
Yo mama's so stupid, on her job application where it says 'emergency contact', she put '911'!
Yo mama's so stupid, on an application it said, "Don't write here", and she wrote, "Why?" !
Yo mama's so stupid, when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line, she put "O.K." !
Yo mama's so stupid, if her I.Q. was any lower, she'd trip over it!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks it's the ice cubes that keeps the freezer cold!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought the board of education was a piece of wood!
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked how to spell UPS !
Yo mama's so stupid, she bought a videocamera to record tv shows!
Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead, trying to makeup her mind!
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked for a price check at the dollar store!
Yo mama's so stupid, she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read!
Yo mama's so old, I told her to act her age... and then she died!
Yo mama's so ugly, when she walks down the street, people say "Damn, is it Halloween already?"!
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, people run up yelling "Taxi!"!
Yo mama's so fat, when she steps on a scale, it said "...to be continued"!
Yo mama's so fat, when she got on a scale, it said "One at a time please"!
Yo mama's so dumb she sat on TV & watched the couch!
Yo mama's so dumb she took a spoon to the Super Bowl!
Yo mama's so dumb that under "Education" on her job apllication, she put "Hooked on Phonics."!
Yo mama's so poor, she was kicking a can down the street. I asked what she was doing, and she said "Moving."!
Yo mama's teeth so yellow when she yawns traffic slows down!
Yo mama's so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention!
Yo mama's so poor your tv got 2 channels: on and off!
Yo mama's so old that when she was in school there was no history class!
Yo mama's so ugly when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the table and start screaming!
Yo mama's so ugly they pay her to put her clothes back on in strip joints!
Yo mama's so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning!
Yo mama's so ugly she has to trick or treat over the phone!
Yo mama's so ugly people go as her for Halloween!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is where You pay Yo telephone bill!
Yo mama's so stupid, that she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W's!
Yo mama's so stupid I said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon!
Yo mama's so stupid that she sold her car for gas money!
Yo mama's so stupid that she go hit by a parked car!
Yo mama's so stupid she thought meow mix was a record for cats!
Yo mama's so stupid she thought hamburger helper came with another person!
Yo mama's so stupid she studied for blood test & failed!
Yo mama's so stupid she asked me "what's that letter after x" and i said Y she said "cause I wana know"!
Yo mama's so stupid she jumped out the window and went up!
Yo mama's so stupid it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Mins!
Yo mama's so dumb, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept!
Yo mama's so dumb, she thinks socialism is partying!
Yo mama's so dumb, she got hit by a cup and told the police that she got mugged!
Yo mama's so fat, when she travels, she's gotta make two trips!
Yo mama's so fat when she went to an all You can eat buffet, they had to install speed bumps!
Yo mama's so fat when she went to the beach and Greenpeace tried to drag her into the water!
Yo mama's so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again!
Yo mama's so fat, she went bungee jumping and broke the bridge!
Yo mama's so fat when she backs up she beeps!
Yo mama's so fat when she went to the beach, everyone started screaming "Free Willy, Free WIlly"!!
Yo mama's so fat they had to baptize her at Sea World!
Yo mama's so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"!
Yo mama's so ugly the animals at the zoo feed her!
Yo mama's so fat, I tried to drive around her and ran out of gas!
Yo mama's so fat she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H D!
Yo mama's so fat she has to buy two airline tickets!
Yo mama's so fat she got hit by a truck and asked "Who threw that rock?"!
Yo mama's so fat she gets clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
Yo mama's so fat she fell in love... broke it!
Yo mama's so fat if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word for it!
Yo mama's so fat her yearbook picture is an arial!
Yo mama's so fat at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts!
Yo mama's so big that they had to change "One size fit's all" to "One size fits most"!
Yo mama's so stupid, on her job application where it says 'emergency contact', she put '911'!
Yo mama's so stupid, on an application it said, "Don't write here", and she wrote, "Why?" !
Yo mama's so stupid, when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line, she put "O.K." !
Yo mama's so stupid, if her I.Q. was any lower, she'd trip over it!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks it's the ice cubes that keeps the freezer cold!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought the board of education was a piece of wood!
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked how to spell UPS !
Yo mama's so stupid, she bought a videocamera to record tv shows!
Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead, trying to makeup her mind!
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked for a price check at the dollar store!
Yo mama's so stupid, she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read!
Yo mama's so old, I told her to act her age... and then she died!
Yo mama's so ugly, when she walks down the street, people say "Damn, is it Halloween already?"!
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, people run up yelling "Taxi!"!
Yo mama's so fat, when she steps on a scale, it said "...to be continued"!
Yo mama's so fat, when she got on a scale, it said "One at a time please"!

Fruit VS Fruit Juice...

Mr.Munky — Sat, 23 Sep 2006 16:18:40 +0800

whats the diffrent between fruit juice n pure fruits...

people says that eating pure fruit will give u more vitamins than fruit juice..

BUT!!

ribena... gives u 4 times more vitamin c than an orange does...

WHICH IS TRUE!!! ARGH!!!!

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need money? read this..

Pure Malaysian

Yo Mama....

Fruit VS Fruit Juice...