We used to be so close...

akinasoul — Tue, 17 Sep 2013 08:06:54 +0800

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I've known this guy for a year now. I met him when I was working in xx company but I've quit 7 months later and now doing another job. When I was working in the same company with him, we were very close. Everywhere we go, people will see us together. People see us as a couple. But I don't feel so. I mean I do feel we are in love with each other, by body languages. But we don't always talk romantically. He was always giving me hints but I'm a slow picker when comes to these kind of stuff, so I've only realized days after when I thought back about what he said. But he never actually said he loves me. Since we are in the same group of friends, we've always hang out together. We went out together once for karaoke and a movie. There were only a few people in the cinema, so he asked me to change to couple seat together. And that time, I thought he only wanted to go higher so that he can see the screen better. Well, I don't really know exactly why he wanted to change. I don't wanna make assumptions. (if he wanted to change because he wanna sit as a "couple", then it's a very very good news. but if he only wanted to change because he wanted to see better, then i will be very embarrassed to think he want to sit as couple).

I never asked him how he truly feels, and I don't dare to.

I'm not a pretty person. Because of this I have a low self-confidence about love. I don't have much experience in love too, so I don't really understand the hints that he's trying to give me (if those are hints at all). Plus, he's a good looking man. I always feel so insecure about myself that I would doubt that he's interested in me. I mean, he's hot. At least, I think he is. But he's really good looking. To prove that, there are a lot of girls in our company like him, until a point where they all "join allies" and trying to bring me down due to their jealousy towards our relationship. In which they managed to push me to quit.

He was so sad when I was leaving the company. Even dedicated me a song and asked me to read the lyrics carefully. The song is "Hargai Aku" by Armada. He posted this song together with another song which is "Bukan Dia Tapi Aku" by Judika. I don't listen to Malay/Indon songs so didn't know what were those songs about.

After I quit, we were still close. Everything is still alright. I got a new job one month later (June) which is very close the previous company. The problem starts when he started to hang out with the "jealous girls". I was so disappointed. He knew about it and he explained that he don't want to fight with them anymore. FYI, he was close to the girls before I came in, and got into fight with them because of me. I accepted his explanation and was okay with him hanging out with them the next time round, cause I'm worried he'll feel isolated/stressful if the fight continues.

2-3 months after that, I feel like we are disconnecting. Hang outs are lesser, phone calls/sms/facebook chats are lesser. It's like we are growing apart. I try to ask him to hang out together with our friends, as frequent as possible. But it just don't feel the same anymore. I asked him is there something wrong.. he said no. I always feel so down when he went out with the jealous girls, while we ourselves are not hanging out as frequent as before. Sometimes I feel like he's prioritize them more than me. But after we hang out again, chit chat and laughing, I got my mood back. It's like he's back to me..... for a little while.

But I just couldn't stop myself from getting so jealous when he went out with the jealous girls (irony). Maybe because I don't get his attention anymore. And I kind of having a meltdown where I blocked him from facebook, phone calls and smses... anything at all. I got my sanity back after a few days. And I wanted to make things clear with him.. I want to know what's really happening, what he's thinking and why he act so disconnected. And I want him to know what I feel about it too.

So I asked him to meet me by saying that I wanted to give him something back, and I want to discuss something with thim at the same time. Which, I lied about giving him something back, of course. It was just a excuse to meet him. I said I wanted to meet him alone, just for 15 mins. He replied me back with a question, "why me alone? what do you want to talk about?". By instinct, I think he doesn't want to meet me alone. But why? It's not like we've never been alone before.... I said I wanted to discuss something with you as a friend, don't think so much. Then he never replied me back again.

And that happened two days ago. It's killing me inside having something unsolved.

I'm planning to meet him tonight to sort things out. Since he doesn't want to meet me alone, then I'll ask our mutual best friend (a guy) to come too. I'm not really good with words, so I'm kinda lost. How should I start? What should I say?

There are a lot of questions in my head
Does he really likes me?
Is it because he thought that I only think him as friend, that he's avoiding me?
Should I tell him that I like him, risking the fact that I don't even know his true feelings?
How should I ask?
SHOULD I ask?

Or maybe I should stick to "friends-only" conversation?

I need some advice and opinions.

ps. he just changed his caller ringtone recently to "Battle Scars" by Guy Sebastian. I know it's silly for me to think there's anything to do with us, but I'm just considering the possibilities cause he does has some kind of way in expressing his feelings through music.

Can a fresh grad be an intern?

akinasoul — Wed, 20 Jun 2012 21:43:23 +0800

Is there such a thing?
If a fresh graduate cant find any job offer, can he apply for internship instead?

How to go Hotel 128 from Bukit Jalil LRT Station?

akinasoul — Thu, 07 Jun 2012 22:49:26 +0800

I'm not familiar around this place so I need some directions and guidance.
Need to go that hotel to meet my bro with public transport.

I've actually checked on Google Maps. Walking distance suggested from the lrt station to the hotel is 38mins.
According to the hotel's webpage, their hotel is located 5 mins from the national stadium.
but i heard my friend told me that the national stadium is just a few minutes from the lrt station.
If total add up it supposedly around 10 mins from the lrt station to the hotel rite?

So I guess there might be a shortcut to the hotel.
Anybody can clarify that to me?
Is it safe to walk? Or should I just take a taxi?

Guys: how do u feel when a girl sms u?

akinasoul — Wed, 14 Sep 2011 22:01:24 +0800

The situation is like this... you were a senior in a college and she was a junior. You went to the same club, have mutual friends and come from the same hometown. You have a little interest in her but never make any move. You two never had any long conversation either. Then you graduated, went back to your hometown and never seen her again although you both live in the same hometown. You are working now and she's still studying in the other state.

After 5 months of graduation, you suddenly get a text message from her asking "How are you?". Will it be weird? Will you think she's creepy? Cause you two are not close enough. How do you feel when girl that you are not close with, texts you all of a sudden?

which broadband has the best coverage in Kuching?

akinasoul — Wed, 04 May 2011 06:35:08 +0800

-deleted-

(just found out there's a same thread exists)

Music School that offers Violin course?

akinasoul — Tue, 14 Sep 2010 22:06:40 +0800

Hi, I'm interested in learning violin. Staying around titiwangsa. Can anybody recommend me some good music schools with good violin teachers around Bukit Bintang, Setapak or somewhere near Titiwangsa that I could just take taxi to? Thanks