Lowyat.NET: Latest topics by Minna No Tabo

Love n Madness

Minna No Tabo — Fri, 16 Jun 2006 22:37:21 +0800

A long time ago, before the world was created and humans set foot on
it, God had put all the human "qualities" in a separate room.

Since all the qualities were bored they decided to play hide & seek.

"Madness" was one of the qualities and he shouted: "I want to count, I
want to count!"

And since nobody was crazy enough to want to seek "Madness", all the
other qualities agreed. So "Madness" leaned against a tree and started
to
count: "One, two,three..."

As "Madness" counted, the qualities went hiding.

"Treason" hid in a pile of garbage..

"Lie" said that it would hide under a stone, but hid at the bottom of
the lake. And Madness continued to count "... seventy nine, eighty,
eighty one..." By this time, all the qualities were already hidden
except "Love ". For stupid as "Love" is, he could not decide where to
hide. And this should not surprise us, because we all know how
difficult it is to hide "Love".

"Madness": "...ninety five, ninety six, ninety seven..." Just when
"Madness" got to one hundred........."Love" jumped into a rose bush
where he hid.

And Madness turned around and shouted: "I'm coming, I'm coming!"

As Madness turned around, "Laziness" was the first to be found,
because "Laziness" was too lazy to hide. "Madness" searched madly and
found "Lie" at the bottom of the lake. One by one, Madness found them
all except Love. Madness was getting desperate, unable to find Love.

Envious of Love, "Envy" whispered to "Madness" "You only need to find
Love, and Love is hiding in the rose bush."

"Madness" Jumped on the rose bush and he heard loud cry. The thorns in
the bush had pierced "Loves" eyes. Hearing the commotion God came into
the room and saw what had happened. He got very angry and cursed
"Madness" and said since "Love" has become blind because of u ...u
shall always be with him" And so it came about that from that day on,
"Love is blind and is always accompanied by Madness!

JOKES TO BRIGHTEN UP YR DAY....

Minna No Tabo — Sun, 28 May 2006 04:32:21 +0800

Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have?

Ted: $10.

Teacher: You don't know maths.

Ted: You don't know my father!

......................................................................

Mother: David, come here.

David: Yes, mum?

Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.

David: But I will only get my report book tomorrow.

Mother: I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now. ...........................................................................

Father: Why did you fail your mathematics test?

Son: On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8 Father : So?

Son: On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8 And on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8. If she can't make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?

..............................................................................

A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father.

Daughter: It's mummy!

Father: How do you know?

Daughter: She didn't say anything.

.................................................................................

Girl: Do you love me?

Boy: Yes Dear Girl: Would you die for me?

Boy: No, mine is undying love

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Man: How old is your father?

Boy: As old as me

Man: How can that be?

Boy: He became a father only when I was born

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Waiter: I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.

Customer: Don't tell me your problems. Give me the menu card.

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Teacher: Simon, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

Simon: No, teacher, it's the same dog!

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Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!

Son: That's why I say she's no good!

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Teacher: "Where were you born?"

Student: "Singapore , Sir."

Teacher: "Which part?"

Student: "All of me, Sir."

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A teacher was asking her class: "What is the difference between 'unlawful' and 'illegal'?" Only one hand shot up. "Ok, answer, Joan" said the teacher "unlawful' is when you do something the law doesn't allow and 'illegal' is a sick eagle."

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Teacher: "How come you do not comb your hair?"

Ah Kow: "No comb, Sir."

Teacher: "Use your dad's then."

Ah Kow: "No hair, Sir."

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A boy came home from school with his exam results. "What did you get?" asked his father. "My marks are under water," said the boy. "What do you mean 'under water'?" "They are all below 'C' level"

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i quit drinking

Minna No Tabo — Sat, 29 Apr 2006 19:38:31 +0800

Banta Strikes Back!!! Banta Singh walks into a bar in Ludhiana & orders
three glasses of Beer and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip
out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar
and orders three more.

The bartender asks him, "You know, beer goes flat after I fill it in the
glass; it would taste better if you bought one at a time."

Banta Singh replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in
Dubai, the other in Canada, and I'm here in Ludhiana. When they left
home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we
drank together." The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and
leaves it there.

Banta Singh becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same
way: He orders three Beers and drinks them in turn.

One day, he comes in and orders only two Beers. All the other regulars
notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second
round, the bartender says," I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I
wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss."

Banta Singh looks confused for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye
and he laughs. "Oh, no," he, says, "Everyone's fine - both my brothers
are alive" .

" Only thing is ---- I just quit drinking"!

consultation service

Minna No Tabo — Sat, 29 Apr 2006 00:29:17 +0800

A lawyer's dog ran into neighbour's restaurant and picked up a piece of meat from the kitchen.

The incensed neighbour called up the lawyer, "Your dog stole a piece of meat from my kitchen. Would you be liable for the cost of the meat?"

The lawyer replied, "Of course, how much was that?"

"Eight dollars."

A few days later, the neighbour received a cheque for $8.00, with an attached invoice which read: Legal Consultation Service: $150.